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You think to yourself, “It’s time for a big weekend. ” without what should be the follow-up thought, “Oh wait no, I remember now that weekend bars are terrible places to go to.” After years of accidental suffering by billions of people, it’s about time we took a long, hard look at this voluntary practice and examine just what a night out at a popular bar entails.Let’s start at the beginning: It’s a Friday night, and you’re excited.Once upon a time a woman named Jo Ann Page posted a video on Facebook in an effort to make a restaurant owner look bad but all it did was make the world think she was a miserable dried up human being who was looking to stir up some trouble.Short version: her sister ordered takeout from the wrong restaurant and Jo Ann didn’t want to drive all the way from the “other side of Sycamore” to get it.
Slack is for teams: small groups where everyone knows one-another by name, can be trusted with one-another's email-addresses and other contact information, can be trusted to only use @everyone triggers for important things, etc.If you want to understand how a cool bar thinks, just take the way every other business thinks—”please the customer and they’ll come back”—and do the opposite. Being forced to stand in line like a tamed snail—often when it’s cold is your first taste of the You’re a Little Bitch strategy. When you finally get to the front, you’ll notice there’s no sign with the bar’s name anywhere, because the bar likes to watch its little bitch customers go through extra trouble to find them.While you wait, you’ll watch several all-girl groups walk to the front of the line without waiting, where the bouncer opens the rope and lets them in. You’re then asked for your ID by someone who may not have been the biggest dick in your high school—but he was the biggest dick in someone’s high school.You get yourself all ready—you look how you’re supposed to look, your friends look how they’re supposed to look, and you all head out to go where you’re supposed to go: the bar.As you arrive, you come up to a familiar scene— Let’s take a moment to discuss what’s actually going on here.